To Jordan Peele:
I love you and your work! But….but….but….Get Out really needed a content editor—badly.
And because it did, I went away disappointed, really disappointed.
Now, the disclaimer…….
Wait for it……
SPOILERS TO COME…..
SPOILERS TO COME…..
SPOILERS TO COME…..
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Here are my developmental questions:
- If they’ve been stealing/luring black men for so long, how come the party only had one black guy there? Did the rest of the whites only need domestic help? Only one white woman wanted a black lover? Really? Then what were the rest of the black dudes doing?
- If Chris was lured for his eyes, why was there a bingo game? What did the rest of the white people think they were going to win? Toasters? Cash prizes?
- Who took the selfies of the girlfriend and the other black dudes? Why? Were the pictures taken before or after the procedure? My guess is before. So why didn’t the girlfriend have one of her and Chris?
- Who left the door open so that Chris could see the photos? This made no sense to me at all.
- So there’s a whole room in the house that has nothing but a box with the photos in it? What?!? Again, no sense at all.
- Why was only ONE black woman taken/lured? Yeah, I get it that Grandma wanted to live forever. (Hey! I’m a grandma. I want to live forever too. I get it already.) But only ONE of the white women wanted to live forever? Give me a break!
- If you were going to have the operation, wouldn’t you want the black guy to be opened up first? Would you really volunteer to be first? Uh, no. White guy was really stupid desperate, right?
- Chris was either too stupid to be that smart OR too smart to be that stupid. When a black guy screams at you, GET OUT, then you should DO IT. Don’t wait around. Besides, Chris knew something wasn’t right long before the guy yelled at him. But props for him figuring out that cotton can be used for something more than picking. And double props for him for the creative use of a deer head.
- Also, if you knew that your phone flash changes the black zombies back into their real selves, would you go around flashy thing to all the rest that you meet? So the first sentence of #8 applies. Which is it? Oh, well, not much difference, right?
Okay, some kudos are in order, right?
- TSA friend: Everyone needs a friend like him. I absolutely loved him.
- The scene with the other investigators: absolutely hysterical. Nice touch, Mr. Peele. Nice touch.
- The reference to black mold: Another nice touch. (I hate to break it to you, but that’s where I knew the plot and was hoping you’d surprise me. But no, game over.)
- Gardener dude killing the girlfriend: Nice. (But that brings me back to the question about why Chris didn’t flashy thing every black person he met. And, yes, I’m borrowing from MIB for flashy thing.)
- Congratulations on getting the writing award! Makes me leery about seeing the other films now.
So, some people wanted to know why I was disappointed in Get Out. Numbers one through nine on the developmental questions list should explain it. They outweigh numbers one through five on the kudos list for me.